I’ve spent part of the day attempting to apply for my visa…gathering the documents needed
(forgetting my passport in the copier)
and spending a couple of hours….yes, hours…on the phone getting quotes for flights.
I made lists of everything that needs to be done and, oh my the lists are long!
I feel like I’ve done so much but yet, there is still SO.MUCH left to get done. I know it’ll happen
(and I’m sure I won’t sleep much again tonight which makes for good little clothes folding/hanging time!)
Among the lists were a couple of fundraisers I wanted to hold to be able to officially call myself..fully funded.
But it occurred to me that I have tomorrow and next Saturday and that’s it. TWO SATURDAYS!!!
So the car wash was scratched, as was a last minute garage sale.
This made me panic a little. I don’t know how I can raise funds while I’m out of the country?
Then, I went and checked my mailbox.
Inside was a little envelope, thin, from an organization called…
The last grant I had out…
(of the about 20 that I’d applied for)
I had been trying not to stress or worry. I know God’s got this…and somehow it’ll all work out. I have a little pile I can sell online before I go. My brother offered to hold the car wash without me. It’d all work out.
It’s funny how you can tell yourself those words over and over, but worry still creeps in.
I was a little turned off by the thin, small envelope. Rejections come in thin, small envelopes. Approvals come in big envelopes with extra stuff. I didn’t really want to open it, because I still wanted to ‘Hope’ that I might could get some funds from this last grant I was waiting to hear about.
The anxiety of not opening the envelope and so, not knowing,
was almost worse than the thought of reading a rejection.
So, I opened it.
Sometimes, big things come in small envelopes.
They have approved me for a grant.
I will still have to budget closely and there can be NO incidentals or extra things ‘coming up’ while I’m traveling (ha..yeah right!!!) but I feel so much better about leaving the country (in TWO WEEKS!!!) and being without a paycheck for the many weeks that I’ll be gone and covering the final costs due while in country. Will it still be tight, yep. Will I still have to budget, yep.
If my brother still wants to hold that car was while I’m gone, will I let him, you bet!
But I can worry a tad bit less now as I go drop a pretty chunk of change on some airplane tickets tomorrow!
(And maybe do a little puking in the airport bathroom, just for good measure…)
(Have I mentioned that I HATE flying!!!!)
You can find out more about Show Hope, here.
I will forever be grateful that this wonderful organization was able to ‘Show Hope’ to Josie and me in our adoption process.